Farewell Amma

To be honest, this post ... would be the most hardest to complete, and might even be the most longest in my entire life. For it comes straight from my heart ... for someone very special, and she meant the whole world to me ... my dearest Amma (mother).

It has taken me a while to think over these last couple of months that has come to pass, with the recent loss of my Amma to cancer.

She was indeed the most loving mother any child could ask for - compassionate, sincere, kind hearted, forgiving, etc. Singled handedly my mom, Shirley, as all her close friends and acquaintances called her, brought up six children with pride and dignity. Never once, have I heard her complain or belittle her children to her friends. To her, we were her pride and joy ... children who would one day appreciate her for who we are today.

It was just about a year ago that I dedicated a post to honor my dearest mom on this very special day we all celebrate as "Mother's Day". Reading it once again, breaks me down to the point I wonder : "Did I do everything right, did I make her proud?"

I ask this same question over and over again, how long will this ripped out part of my heart last? I reckon, only God will have the actual answer to that. I've lost my Amma. She was cremated some two weeks ago, but I still can't get over of the fact of losing her, and cry every night silently in my room. I think about her all the time. In this life, she is gone, she is no more. I will never hear her voice again, or ever see her smile.

What I've learnt from this situation is that when a loved one dies, we experience various stages of grief. Basically there are four key stages : Shock, Denial/Anger, Sadness/Depression, and Acceptance. And trust me, there is no pre-set time limit on how long it might take a person to move through this stages, and the stages can recycle over and over again, throughout one's living life.

I found that spending every chance my family and I get to be with my dad (if there's an award for the most understanding and loving husband/father, my dad, will surely top that list, anytime!) over the weekends is important during this trying times. Friends tell me : "Nihal, you need time to adjust to a life without your mother, and this takes time. Allow yourself the time to experience the pain of losing your mom, and after awhile, you should be able to return to the things you enjoy doing." But believe you me, this is so damn hard to practice in real life.

I have learned a lot about the grieving process and have come to realize that eventually I will never get over the loss of my mom. I do not feel I will ever truly accept her loss, but have learned to acknowledge the loss of my Amma, and will try to move on with my life, and will make sure of keeping her a very part of it all.

I used to think that Mother's Day was just another simple holiday? The day where all the children were especially nice to one another so that our Mom could enjoy some "peace and quiet," and it's definitely a commodity which is in short supply in most of our mothers' lives nowadays. But I know that we treated our Mom as a "Queen for the Day" in those less-harried times.

Children — even when we've become adults — we need a way to express our love for our Mom. It was easy back then, when we were young and could easily fashion a statement out of some paper and glue. But sadly to some, It gets harder when their lives become filled with new duties and obligations. Being the youngest in the family like me, we're showered with all the examples and reasoning's the eldest always give. When we grow up, we need to find a new way to say "I love you", once you do this ... it is everlasting! Believe me ... I saw this in my Mom's face, every time I told her this.

Maybe it's just me, but Mother's Day will never be the same again. To me, this has to be THE day, if you're too busy chasing your financial freedom that other 364 days, a child needs to reflect on the sacrifices a Mom had put in raising them up, never once ever complaining, making sure there's food always on the table, and ultimately cherishing sweet memories and for that one day in your life ... if you could ... just say out loud, and raise your arm and give her that big warm hug that a Mom truly deserves, and you tell her with all your heart ... "Mom, I love you so much, you're the greatest. You have brought me up well!" This will surely send them a message that "I still remember all you did for me."

What I will miss though from my Mom's absence is : Her frequent calls to me, her regular stays at my house, her visiting my daughter at the hospital (take note, this is a lady who practically can't see anything beyond five feet away from her very clearly, and yet she's there after catching a cab, at the hospital ward, showing her support for her youngest grand-daughter), her charitable deeds (all her grand-children calls her 'Mother Mary' for this), her positive attitude towards life, and her missing the sight of seeing my daughter walk on her own, but mostly, ... I will miss her smile, her touch and seeing her enjoying her holidays, more so when she's always around her daughter, my only sister (she is indeed another Angel sent from heaven above).

Amma, thank you for who I am

Thank you for all the things I'm not



Forgive me for the words unsaid along the way
And for the times I forgot

Amma, remember all my life
You have showed me love, You sacrificed
How I've changed along the way

And I know you believed
And I know you had dreams
And I'm sorry it took all this time for me to see
That I am where I am, because of your truth
I miss you

Amma, forgive me for the times you've cried

Amma, forgive me for not making right
All of the storms I may have caused you
And I've been wrong

Amma, I hope this makes you smile
I hope you're happy with my life
At peace with every choice I've made
And I know you've believed in all of my dreams
And I owe it all to you ... Amma

And I will forever be your son (in this life and the next) ... this I promise!

Ideas For Kitchen Cabinets

How does one get the best ideas in creating their dream kitchen cabinet or countertop?

Most designers will tell you, you can never look at too many photos of kitchen cabinets and countertops. Create a file of features you like; it's OK to make judgments based on appearance in this case. Select colors, styles, details, and configurations you love. Then, think about function. Imagine you're preparing a holiday dinner : What storage systems would make it easy for you to find your baster, roasting pan, and muffin tins? Picture your dinner guests perched on stools at your island bar : what type of countertop would be the most comfortable under their elbows - and the easiest to clean once they've gone home?

Of all the products you'll consider for your new kitchen or bath, cabinetry offers you the greatest chance to customize. You'll be amazed by your options : raised-panel doors for traditional settings; slab (unadorned) doors for a sleek, streamlined approach; glossy lacquered finishes that convey a contemporary European look. Choose from woods as familiar as maple, oak, and cherry or as exotic as wenge and anigre.

Discover a seemingly limitless array of colors created by stain, paint, and glaze. Add decorative hardware, glass inserts (available in a variety of textures and patterns), and embellishments such as corbels and legs. And remember, you'll want to outfit cabinet interiors with storage systems suited to your stuff and style.

New cabinets are an investment you probably will live with for some time. They will likely also require the largest portion of your budget - often as much as half - for kitchen products. Your first step when shopping for cabinetry is to weigh your budget against your desire for customization. Door styles, wood species, and storage options combine to create a one-of-a-kind kitchen, but also ramp up the cost. A professional designer can help you make choices that balance your budget with your vision of your future kitchen.

Here's some buying tips when shopping for cabinetry :

• Collect pictures of kitchens that appeal to you to establish the overall flavor you're interested in before you start comparing specific products. Such a portfolio is an ideal starting point for working with a designer, who will ask questions about the pictures and plan a design based on your answers.

• Study cabinets at home centers and showrooms. With displays that often mimic full-size kitchens, you can compare finishes, get a feel for what it's like to bend and reach when opening doors and drawers, and investigate the many accessories that boost storage and convenience.
  

• If you're interested in glass-front cabinets, first decide what you'll store in them. Clear glass is best when you wish to put items such as a dinnerware collection on display and you want visual "open space". Ribbed and other types of patterned glass add a textural element. You'll still see what's behind these glass doors, but the effect is somewhat abstract. Frosted-glass doors are the best choice when you want to break up the monotony of wood doors while obscuring contents.

Shopping for cabinetry and countertops will likely be the most daunting - and priciest - aspect of creating your new space. But if you see things my way, you'll no doubt discover that it's also the most rewarding. Let the matchmaking begin!

History of Wharfedale

One of my greatest passions in life is to find time to sit down in my room, with a warm cup of coffee in my hand, and listening to a CD from my favorite all-time 80's band; a-ha. And thanks to a great pair of Wharfedale loudspeakers, these guys seem to be performing "live concerts in my room" on a daily basis, if you know what I mean. These loudspeakers communicate not just the music as it was recorded, but also the very essence of the performance! This inspired me to finally sit down and write a post on the History of Wharfedale.

Wharfedale was in fact founded in 1932, by Gilbert Briggs who built his first loudspeakers in the cellar of his home in Ilkley in Yorkshire, England. This quiet market town was located in the valley of the river 'Wharfe', hence 'Wharfedale', the unlikely setting for the birth of a brand that was to become synonymous with quality and technology wherever hi-fi was used throughout the world.

In 1933, a small factory was established in nearby Bradford in order to build the increasingly popular loudspeaker drive units. In the same year the Wharfedale Wireless Works won both first and second prizes in a national competition organized by the Bradford Radio Society. These were but the first of many awards that the company has since received. From this time, Wharfedale went from strength to strength, and, following a move to a larger factory, production reached 9,000 speakers in the year 1939.

During the war years the company concentrated on the production of transformers for military equipment, but in 1945 a new factory was found and loudspeaker production restarted with a staff of over 20. Production levels grew dramatically with loudspeakers being shipped across the world and in 1956 Wharfedale formed its own subsidiary company in the USA and the following year opened a massive new automated cabinet factory in Bradford.

Gilbert has built quite a reputation for himself for pioneering a hifi industry. His popularity extends to the books he has written which led him to stage an audacious series of concerts to compare live vs. recorded music. These concert demonstrations became very famous, using Wharfedale loudspeakers with either Quad or Leak electronics. It also led to the very close working relationship between Gilbert and Peter Walker of Quad that led to the next major development for Wharfedale.

In 1958 Gilbert Briggs, by then over 68 years old, sold the company to the Rank Organization; a major UK industrial group which also owned the audio electronics company Leak and also Heco; a German loudspeaker company. Rank made major investments in R&D and in marketing and distribution. Wharfedale continued to lead the loudspeaker world in technological developments with the introduction in 1960 of roll-surround suspensions and in 1961 the first use of ceramic magnets.

By 1988 Wharfedale Loudspeakers plc was listed on the London Stock Exchange and in 1992 the company changed its name to the Verity Group plc and purchased a number of other companies including Mission; Cyrus; Quad (all British hi-fi companies) and Premier Musical Instruments. The then managing director of Wharfedale led a management buyout and formed a new company; the International Audio Group which incorporated Wharfedale loudspeakers; Quad audio electronics; Leak high-end audio electronics and Airedale loudspeakers.

As for the man who started it all, Gilbert Briggs died in 1978 but his legacy and enthusiasm lives on in his products. Today Wharfedale is a truly international company with its Marketing and Design departments headquarters in Huntingdon, England.

So the next time you have a look at a Wharfedale loudspeaker, remember, you're getting a product which has a 75 year experience, one of the most advanced research and development programmes, and high quality control processes in the industry.